“YOLO” my friend wrote underneath my Facebook status the other day. I had no idea what it meant, so consulted with the Urban Dictionary and discovered that ‘you only live once’, which I wholeheartedly agree with. It got me thinking that there are plenty of things I say throughout the course of the day, that I don’t necessarily mean.
Here are some of my favourite dual meaning phrases
“I’m going to the toilet to do a big stinky poo!” roughly translates to: I’m going to hide in the loo to catch up on social media for the only ten minutes this entire day that I’m likely to get a bit of peace.
“Let me take a photo of you guys to send to Daddy.” roughly translates to: I’m going to plaster your faces all over Facebook, Twitter and IG, but you won’t smile if I tell you that.
“I’m just quickly texting Daddy.” roughly translates to: I’m going to see how many emails I can plough through in the next five minutes, before you start kicking off about me being on my phone.
“Just a minute darling.” roughly translates to: it’ll probably take at least half an hour to finish this task.
“This is a chocolate milkshake.” roughly translates to: this is the only way to sneak some goodness into your diet (Freddy, I’m looking directly at you here). By flavouring it with chocolate, I can get you to eat avocado, spinach, egg yolk, yoghurt and banana in one fell swoop. Here’s a great recipe, just in case you’re interested.
“I’m going out with my mummy friends.” roughly translates to: I’m going to get over excited, drink way too much gin, fall asleep on the train home and end up at Gatwick Airport #truestory.
Do you say things that have a dual meaning? Tweet me your faves @mummytries