how do you do it

The Trouble with Mother’s Day

Mother’s Day is a tricky one for me It reminds me of the obvious lack of mother in my own life. It’s now been so long since I saw her face, I can’t even properly remember what it looks like. It poses a mixed bag of emotions every time a so-called special day presents itself. Mother’s Day. Birthdays. Anniversaries. The last time I saw her. The last time we communicated. I estranged myself from my mother several years before I started having children. I coped with a full on mental breakdown, and hit rock bottom with no family support whatsoever. …

survivor of abuse

When You Are the Survivor of Abuse #metoo

Sometimes the term survivor of abuse makes me cringe Other times it chokes me up, leaving me wanting to bawl my eyes out, or rock myself in the corner. I dislike it so much because it implies victim status, but I’ve come to see that this label is inescapable. It is what it is, because no matter how hard we try to make our tomorrows brighter, we can not erase yesterday. Us survivors carry the scars of the past around, like invisible (or visible) wounds of the battlefield. These scars are etched into our souls, and haunt us while we …

how to help yourself

Does Your Child Think Rape is Funny?

I read a deeply disturbing article today. About the rape of a 15yo girl being broadcast via Facebook Live. If that wasn’t bad enough, she is now being harassed online, and told she’ll be got at again. Unsurprisingly she is too terrified to go home, and is staying with relatives. The thing I find most troubling is that the kids watching thought it was funny That raping another human being amounted to nothing more than teenage kicks. That they would be so brazen about doing this unthinkable thing, that they’d stream it live on the internet. I don’t know about you, …

sibling bullying

When Sibling Bullying is Destroying Your Family 

This is very much the article I’ve been putting off writing. I’m sure there will be a backlash. An air of ‘you shouldn’t have said that…’ I’m tired though, I’m exasperated, and I need these words out of my head. For my own catharsis if nothing else. Every single day, sibling bullying tears our family to shreds. My eldest daughter Polly picks on her younger brother and sister, relentlessly.   People ask me if I think our lives would be easier without autism in it, and my honest answer is: YES I DO! I know I shouldn’t be saying things like …