While I was away on my own in Ibiza recently, I had a chat with a random, as you do. He asked me, in all seriousness, if people actually had three children in this day and age.
He spoke as if a bigger family was some kind of urban myth, and going against the 2.4 grain and breaking the unwritten rules would be a truly ludicrous thing to do.
Unsurprisingly this guy doesn’t have any children of his own, and didn’t strike me as the type of person who encountered many kids in his day to day. For some inexplicable reason I can’t shake this short-lived conversation off, his naivety (and rudeness) have been playing on my mind.
His thoughts are not unique though, and largely you are going against the grain by having a bigger family (which is anything more than two kids) these days. Most of our friends and family thought we were crazy when we announced our third pregnancy.
I’ve been noticing looks over the holidays – sideways glances from young folk off on adventures that don’t include changing nappies or pushing a buggy. Some comment on public transport, or when we’re out and about, saying ‘you’re braver than I am’, or ‘I couldn’t even cope with one let alone three…’
So here’s a little list I’ve compiled, to answer all those burning questions you might have*
Yes, they are all mine, I’m not the nanny.
Yes, they all have the same dad, we are even married!
No, we didn’t have a third because we were desperate for a boy.
In fact number three wasn’t planned at all, but then the best things in life rarely are.
My standards have undoubtedly got lower with each child, but that’s not such a bad thing. Motherhood and perfectionism do not belong on the same page, and certainly not in the same sentence.
It might take us longer, and we are usually running late, but we do manage to leave the house and do stuff.
We also manage to go on holiday (abroad), and have a great time.
Three children is commonly revered as the hardest number of kids you can have, and certainly for the first couple of years I’d be inclined to agree.
At least one of them is always always hungry. Peace had to be made early on with how much my grocery bill costs.
It is true, that three is an odd number, and one will mostly be left out. However, when all three play nicely together it makes me want to weep with happiness and pride.
With three you are hedging your bets. Surely at least one will be willing to look after you in old age?
Just think, my lovely friend Mel has four children, and some people have even more than that…
*this list was complied just for sh*ts and giggles, and is by no means exhaustive. Feel free to tweet me @mummytries with anything you’d like to add!