The Greatest Showman
Mental Health

My Darling

I’ve read blog posts recently where people have written letters to their kids, which is lovely. I briefly considered doing the same, but decided it would be too easy for me. Although my girls have their moments, I have loved them both from the second they entered the world. I have never questioned this love and I never had doubts over my abilities to parent them when they were little babies. I could write many posts on how wonderful they are, but I won’t.

The way I see it, there wouldn’t be any children without my long suffering utterly amazing husband. He truly is my rock, my knight, my everything. So here’s a little story, about my darling.

my darlingWe met on our travels in Asia and spent a blissful six weeks together before having to go our separate ways. He was Australia bound and had a years working holiday planned. I was heading home. My brother had spent the previous month in a mental institute and my mother had convinced herself (and me) that I was the only person that could talk sense into him and ‘save’ him. What actually happened signalled the beginning of the end for me and my family – he was rude and obnoxious telling me I’d come home for other reasons, and that I was trying to make him feel guilty. She was completely disillusioned and I realised that we had been here before. Rather than stay behind to watch the car crash in slow motion I went to the travel agents, and was in Australia within a fortnight.

We partied hard and travelled a bit, enjoying a very carefree six months before heading home. Didn’t last very long in Blighty before going back out to Asia with grand plans and big dreams. We had some very dark times over the course of the next year but left in one piece, albeit separately. There was another dark year ahead, but he patiently waited for me to come out the other side. Most men would have cut their losses long before, but he didn’t and he has never held a grudge.

With the odds stacked against us back then, we are now the envy of most of our friends. We don’t have a perfect life, far from it, but we’re a team. We communicate and work through our troubles. We have interests outside the family unit, but have found ways to accommodate them sensibly so they aren’t bones of contention. We have made sacrifices which enables me to only have to work part time, but neither of us views this negatively. He doesn’t feel I’m not pulling my weight and I don’t feel like I’m ‘living off a man’ because (I’ll say it again) we are a team.

On the flip side we bicker every single day. We snipe at each other and are some times plain horrible on the really sleep deprived mornings. But we always find our way back to a happier place by the time we go to bed. I don’t think we’ve ever closed our eyes without a kiss or a kind word in the moments before sleep washes over us.

Life hasn’t always dealt me a very nice hand, but when it comes to my little family I lucked out. So thank you darling husband, I know I will love you until I take my very last breath.

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26 Comments

  1. […] between my two breakdowns, I met my husband. He has always been stable, confident in his own abilities and an all round rock solid guy. I still […]

  2. Thanks lovely. The universe really did sort me out eventually, and although we have our moments he is absolutely fantastic, and I don’t know where I’d be without him xxx

  3. What a gorgeous post Renee xxx I am so, so sorry to hear about your family, that really breaks my heart. It sounds like it has been tough but the universe decided to give you a break in the form of your hubby 🙂

    Thank you for linking up to #Thelist xxxx

  4. Such a lovely post 🙂 #Thelist #pocolo

  5. Am just about holding it together after reading that – lovely post and what a wonderful love story #TheList

  6. What a great letter to your husband! 🙂 well said!

  7. Aww what a beautiful post for your hubby – he sounds like a wonderful man. I thinking making sure you always end the day in a happier place and not letting those bickery moments carry forward into the next day is such a good idea.

  8. Well I think he’s just as lucky as you. What a gorgeous piece that made my heart flip. xx

  9. Lovely letter. And wonderful that you have weathered tough times to be in such a good and happy place!

  10. […] pieces and had not one but two breakdowns. I cut ties with my entire family. I very nearly lost my husband through my own […]

  11. […] built on a huge fancy wedding, false hopes and empty promises. We had been together for five years first and it was built on a foundation of true love. Of adventures and stories to tell the grand […]

  12. […] them. I also know that I wouldn’t be half the person I am today without the support of my wonderful husband and amazing friends. I still have wobbly moments though, where life feels so over whelming I could […]

  13. […] I am grateful for my husband, who excels himself with his never ending […]

  14. […] is where a piece of my heart will remain forever. It’s where hubby and I met, fell in love and bonded in a way that signified ‘something else’ going on other than a […]

  15. […] travel adventure there on New Years Day 2004. Six weeks later in another SE Asian country I met my hubby. I think we passed through Bangkok about eight times in the first two years of our relationship, […]

  16. […] me, and I used the money to get away from everyone and go travelling. Six months into my trip I met my husband, and although the road from then until now has been bumpy in parts, he truly is the love of my […]

  17. […] day. The trip was the best decision I ever made – not least because it was where I met the love of my life. I’d been on the road for almost six months at that point, and in SE Asia for two. We met in […]

  18. […] beautiful 20mo in her Bugaboo, off to collect her big sister from school and happened to clock my left hand, you would probably assume that I led a very charmed life. You would have no idea of the anguish […]

  19. […] flings, and too many one night stands, but didn’t have another proper boyfriend until I met my husband. It took me a long time to come to terms with the level of hurt he had caused me, and allow myself […]

  20. […] self-help books and a lot of support from the poor long suffering guy that calls himself my husband, I am no longer that person. I truly believe it is possible to get through just about anything life […]

  21. […] Louis Polisar – All I Want Is You An unconventional wedding song, this is what was playing as hubby and I walked out of the registry office after getting married. It was also playing in the […]

  22. judithkingston says:

    Wonderful. This is what I would wish for every single person struggling to break free from a troubled past and dysfunctional family – that they can build a functional family of their own. I am so so pleased that you have managed to do this. Your husband sounds like an amazing man – and you are a pretty amazing lady yourself!

  23. How absolutely beautiful. You are so right, there are so many letters to our kids but they wouldn’t be here without wonderful hubbys like yours. Thank you so much for linking to PoCoLo x

  24. Ah, nice sentiment.

  25. awww this is beautiful xx

  26. Such a benefit to have a strong relationship with your partner when you have young children, the support is invaluable. #PcCoLo

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