Something I have noticed since I’ve been blogging is the amount of people constantly justifying why they do or have done things. Or seeking approval from their followers about a certain topic. Or saying something in one post and having a different stance on the same matter in the next. It leads me to believe that these people don’t actually know themselves, which makes me sad. I’ve written before about the importance of dealing with your demons, but as with any kind of problem in life you have to admit you have one before you can seek help or advice for it.
There have been numerous studies recently into the link between Facebook usage and depression, and it would appear the more a person is on Facebook the more depressed they will likely become. Lets be honest here, no-one posts photos of themselves looking like they need to go on a diet or buy some acne cream. Yet it’s so easy to get caught in the trap of thinking everyone else is faring up better than you are. Everyone else is prettier/slimmer/has nicer skin/is a better parent, etc etc.
From where I am standing, the gap between fantasy and reality is becoming small. People also seem to be losing the ability to properly communicate with one another in the real world. Having text arguments is becoming the norm. Writing ‘happy birthday, have a great day x’ on a persons FB page has replaced sending a card, or calling to genuinely wish them a great day. It’s all getting a bit too warped for my liking. While I’m not going to come off FB altogether, over the last few months I have massively scaled down the amount of time I spend on it. The first step for me was deleting the app from my iPhone – it was all too tempting to click on that blue button if I had a spare five minutes. I now check it once a day or every other day, and my addiction to the social networking site is definitely over. I also deleted my photo albums – all fifty odd. Now that they’re a publicly traded company I don’t trust them to keep the snaps of my family truly private. I’ll post the odd pic here and there, but won’t be sharing my life the way I used to.
I’d like to think I’m a what you see is what you get person – not a chameleon that changes who I am depending on who I’m with. I never gossip and I’m a good secret keeper. Friends often come to me with their problems, because they trust me. If I’m having a shocker of a day and know I’ll be bad company I will cancel plans and not inflict myself upon others. In most situations I wouldn’t say something about a person that I wouldn’t say to their face. Of course it’s hardly ever appropriate to tell someone that you think their hubby is a shithead or that you can’t stand their annoying kid. Although I try and be as diplomatic as possible, I’ll never just say something because I think it’s what the other person wants to hear. This doesn’t always make me popular, in fact I think I lost a recent friendship mainly because I asked questions that she didn’t want to ask herself let alone answer out loud. I don’t do small talk, falsities and bullshit though. I feel that one must be true to themselves in this life, otherwise what is the point?
Do you agree or are you a people pleaser? I’d love to hear from you in the comments section.