Why I’m Saying Goodbye to my Well Paid Part Time Job

It’s been no secret that I found going back to work really tough after my third maternity leave. Although we made my working life as easy as it could possibly get, there is no way to dress it up. It has been a shi**y experience.

First there was the disaster nanny who we hired to look after our two youngest kids. We thought she would provide a flexible and beneficial all round solution to our childcare dilemma, but in actual fact she wasn’t very good. Then there was nursery, but after almost five months F did not settle. He would cry all day, hardly nap and refuse food. I can’t even bring myself to think of the damage this might have caused.

Although I had a work from home agreement, which meant only having to commute into the City once a month, it also meant that I was never able to fully switch off from what was happening at home. Rather than looking forward to the break that work would provide it has been a major cause of stress, and on more than one occasion, the straw that broke the camels back.

It’s been a far cry from the sanity saver work has been for me in the past. When I first started this job five years ago after my first maternity leave I loved it. I would literally waltz out the door and not have a single qualm about any aspect of being a working mum. P loved nursery and it was a great little break from the hum drum of motherhood twice a week. Second time around was the same. For reasons far more complex than I can quickly sum up here, I believe that going back after my second maternity leave saved me from spiralling into a major depression.

Things have been very different third time around. So when a glimmer of an opportunity for redundancy presented itself to me I pounced on it.

entrapraneurshipI’ve written about my fab job before, and know that many will think I am crazy. Most folk would jump at the chance of working part time for a top investment bank, and getting paid in two days what some earn in a week.

Here’s the thing though: all the money in the world could not change the heart wrenching fact that my little ones hated their childcare, and would without fail, come home in a complete state. That my poor baby boy would protest by going on hunger strike, and it would take at least until Monday to get him back to a happy enough place for me to leave the room without him having a full scale meltdown.

Perhaps, dear readers, it’s where attachment parenting came back to bite me on the arse?

Or perhaps my life and priorities have changed so dramatically since having him that the Corporate City doesn’t have a place in my world any more?

Up until now we haven’t had a choice. Financially we just couldn’t make the numbers work. We were still paying off hubby’s student loan until April FFS.

Then he went and got himself promoted, and now we do have a choice.

Money will of course be tighter, but between not paying out for astronomical childcare costs and making a few sensible cutbacks, I think we’ll be just fine.

So here I am, changing the necessary once again.

I grew up surrounded by people that were desperately unhappy with their lot in life, but did nothing constructive to alter the course of their destiny.

I vowed I would never do that myself, and I haven’t. I’m steering things towards leading the life I want, rather than the one I have to lead. Or the one that society and convention deem I should be leading. In doing so I’m pretty confident I’ll have a much happier family on my hands too. We are finally in a position to fully consider all our options. Thursday was my last day at the office.

So, this is why I’m saying goodbye to my well paid part time job.

Wish me luck πŸ™‚

sundaystars.badge_

 wpid-thetruthaboutbadge_zps84f6dddd.jpg

Digiprove sealThis content has been Digiproved © 2015

76 Replies to “Why I’m Saying Goodbye to my Well Paid Part Time Job”

  1. Love this article and I completely applaud you 100% for your decisions within this article. πŸ™‚

  2. Thanks so much honey, it’s felt like a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders xxx

  3. Oh lovely lady, good luck. It sounds like you have made the best decision for your family and that is all you can do. I hope these leads to you living the happier life that you want. Hugs Mrs H xxxx

  4. Thanks very much for sharing how you got to your decision – I always appreciate reading these. I still work, but have made some choices along the way I wouldn’t have pre-kids to try and make the full-picture that is life now work for our family. And I think that’s what it comes down to. Making it work as best it can as a whole – however that’s going to work for your family. I wish you every success with the new changes!

  5. Hey lovely, have been away and catching up with some reading, clearly there’s been some big changes for you! I’m glad it’s all working out and hope it removes just a bit of stress from life! Hugs xx

  6. Thanks Carol! It has been a decision we’ve been coming to gradually over the course of this last year… After just one week of no work I already feel SO much better πŸ™‚

  7. Thanks Katie, the promotion was very fortunately timed and thank goodness we can now make the numbers work xx

  8. A very brave decision but one that sounds like it came at the perfect time for your family. Congrats to your hubby for the promotion! Thanks for linking up with #sundaystars x

  9. Ah good luck Renee. Seriously tough decision in so many ways but such an easy in so many other ways. Perhaps you might be able to squeeze a little bit more blogging in? πŸ˜‰

  10. Thanks so much John, it really was. I honestly am completely happy about it πŸ™‚

  11. Thanks so much my lovely, I already feel loads happier for it xxx

  12. Thanks so much Jenny, it’s already a huge relief πŸ™‚

  13. Thanks so much Jenny, it’s already a huge relief πŸ™‚

  14. You are so lovely Sam, thanks honey. And you never know, home ed may well be on the cards. The absolute best thing is that now I get to choose what I do xx

  15. Thanks so much Sara, it already feels like a huge weight has been lifted from my shoulders xx

  16. Thanks so much Tinuke! I remember reading your story a few months back, and all this was whirling around in my mind but we weren’t in a position financially to consider it. Everything happens for a reason though, because those few extra months made all the difference πŸ™‚ xxx

  17. So so true Maria, nothing in life that’s worth having is easy to get. I’m so pleased that you’re happy at home with your girl; I know without a doubt that I’m making the right decision too. It’s a shame that a big pocket of society thinks being a mum is an unimportant job, because as far as I’m concerned, it’s the most important one we will ever have.

  18. My situation was similar. I loved my job, and, like you, would waltz into work without any qualms. Then, I had my daughter and everything was flipped on its side. Many consider my choice to stay-at-home the easy way out. Some would even incorrectly assume that we’re so well-off financially that I can manage to stay home with my daughter.

    Of course, that’s not the case. We’re not as comfortable as we used to be, and we’ve sacrificed a few since I left my job this past April (after extending my maternity leave…twice). Sure, it would be easier to go back to work and relish in the two income household, but that wouldn’t do any good for my daughter. Or for me for that matter.

    I’m glad I’m not the only one making this sacrifice, and I’m happy that you get this opportunity, sacrifice and all, to be with your family. It wouldn’t be without its challenges, of course. But then again, what fun would life be without all the twists and turns it entails, right?

  19. As someone who also left investment banking for the sake of my happiness / sanity, I say bravo!! It’s a big move but I think you and your family will benefit so much for it, I know mine did despite the massive income drop.
    Wishing you the best xxx

  20. All the very best Renee, it really does sound like the best decision for you, well done for making sure you’re doing what you feel is best x Huge hugs lovely x

  21. I’m sure you will miss aspects of it but not others. Congratulations to Andy for the promotion – it’s nice to actually feel like you have some options and putting the children’s needs first is right up there. I think knowing you that you will do something very successful in your own way, probably from your own home and you might even throw home schooling into the mix? One step too far? πŸ™‚ Good luck hon, my very best wishes with your new direction Xx #thetruthabout

  22. I do wish you luck! It sounds like working was what was good for everyone in the past, but circumstances change and now it’s not doing anyone any favors (including you!) I hope you find a better balance that works for your family.

  23. oh lovely this is fabulous, yes there will be cutbacks but sometimes we know where we need to be don’t we? Sounds like a fab solution on so many levels xxx

  24. Very best of luck. You do what you have to do and your needs and your family’s needs are bound to ebb and flow over the course of time. It certainly sounds to me like redundancy was the best option for you right now. Odd to say that, but true! Sure you won’t look back with any regrets. #thetruthabout

  25. A brave decision, Renee! But one that you have clearly considered carefully and made for all the right reasons. I hope everything works out for you, the children and Andy.

  26. Good luck lovely! I really struggled giving up my job during my second maternity leave, but in the end it would not have been best for our family. We are living a very lean life these days, but next September my youngest will begin school and I can find a job nearby (I don’t think I want to commute into Central London again). #thetruthabout

  27. I wish you all the luck in the world my friend…but I have a feeling that you are going to be just fine. It’s a hard decision to make, I do know this personally for I gave up a 20+ year career that I had built from scratch when I decided to take the plunge into motherhood. You will conquer and your children I am sure will be much happier. **cheekies**

  28. Good luck! This does sound brave, especially given how much you needed it the first and second time. I can’t imagine not being able to leave my kids a few days a week for grown up time. But definitely not at the cost of desperately unhappy bubs. My son had to go to a new nursery one of the 3 days a week when he was about 18 months (because we’d moved). He was SO unhappy there. I felt sick leaving him. I completely understand how hard it is. Well done you! #TheTruthAbout

  29. Thanks lovely, it’s been a tough year and the decision wasn’t an easy one, but I’m feeling confident it’s the right one xx

  30. Thanks so much xx

  31. Its a massive decision but this post convinces me you have totally done the right thing. At the pearly gates you are not going to reflect on your job and money but the happiness of your children, your fabulous relationship with them all on the time you spent together. Lovely post xx #thetruthabout

  32. Well done – this is a beautifully written post but also such a wonderful life decision. Thank you for sharing it with us. Good luck with the next adventure x

  33. These are my thoughts exactly Nikki. It was the childcare element this time round that made it so hard. I’m slightly scared about what the future holds, but also very excited about the next chapter πŸ™‚

  34. Family comes first and it sounds like this decision was the best one for you and your family. I can sense that it was hard for you to give up your job, but it doesn’t mean the end of your working life. You have your blog business after all and I’m sure that takes up a lot of your time. Your kids will appreciate having you around more. These early years are hard and it takes a lot out of you. Hope you can enjoy your time with them, now you’ve not got the worry about going to work hanging over your head.

  35. It seems to be a common occurrence among bloggers, so pleased things worked out as well as they have for you my lovely. Fingers crossed for me xxx

  36. Totally with you on that one lovely, nothing worth doing was ever not scary and easy xxx

  37. Tee hee I read that as the words are your oyster… that definitely has a ring to it πŸ˜‰

  38. I was in a similiar situation a few years ago, so I totally understand where you’re coming from. Best of luck for the future. xxx

  39. Thanks so much Zena, really hoping so xx

  40. Wow that’s a huge decision but definitely looks like you’ve thought it out properly and is the right one for the future of your family. Sometimes these things are scary but the right thing to do xx

  41. I can feel the excitement in this post! The world is your oyster sweet pea!

  42. Exciting times! I have a feeling this will work out just fine for you and you won’t look back once you get settled into your new routine. Good luck Hun x

  43. Thanks so much, luck and hugs always greatly appreciated xx

  44. Thanks so much Kirsten. You are of course completely correct – I doubt highly that anyone would look back on their life and regret choosing their family over work πŸ˜‰

  45. Well done. You are grabbing life with both hands and going for what is right for you and your family. The likelihood of you getting to the end of your life and thinking ‘I wish I spent more time at work’ is almost zero because in the long run many of the things we are told by society that are important are not all they are cracked up to be. Great news. #sundaystars

  46. That’s exactly what I’m hoping Alex. I’ll of course keep you posted. Hope you’re well xx

  47. Thanks so much πŸ™‚

  48. Thanks so much Claire. Sounds like leaving the conventional world was the best thing for you and I’m almost certain it will be for me too. As you said, everyone was struggling, and I’m excited about removing that element of stress from our lives. Really appreciate your thoughtful comment xx

  49. Very true, and what works one year might not the next which is why it’s so important to be open to change πŸ™‚

  50. I know, it wouldn’t have been possible otherwise…

  51. Oh well done you! It sounds as if things have been terribly tough for you and you are acting in the best interests of all of you – kids, hubby and, most importantly, you. I send you a mountain of good luck in your new ventures and a thousand hugs as you embark on a new chapter in your life.

  52. It sounds to me like you’ve made the right decision. I think you’ll be able to enjoy life much more now and many different opportunities will present themselves to you. x

  53. Good for you for taking a scary leap Renee. I bet it’ll be the best thing for all of you in the long run. Good luck!

  54. The very best of luck with your decision – for what it’s worth, if you were all struggling, then you made the right choice.
    When I walked away from a great part time job with a leading national charity everyone thought I was crazy. However, the commute, the fact that ‘part time’ never actually meant part time and the way I adapted the motherhood (after losing my first child and being a bit crazy with it all) meant our lives weren’t in the happy place we wanted them to be. I joined my husband in our business and it actually all turned out pretty well. seven years and one more child later and although I remember my ‘out of home’ working life fondly (mainly for the shopping at lunch time) I know we made the right decision – for me and my (much happier) family.
    Be gentle with yourself, it can take adjustment, but hopefully your family life will feel the benefit – onward and upward!
    Xx

  55. What works for one doesn’t always work for another, well done for changing your life to work for you again. Good luck πŸ™‚ #sundaystars
    Debbie
    http://www.myrandommusings.blogspot.com

  56. Good on you Renee! It sounds like the right choice. How lucky that the chance for redundancy came up now.
    Good luck with the changeover to staying at home.
    Fionnuala from http://www.threesonslater.blogspot.com

  57. Thanks so much xx

  58. Thanks so much for dropping by Alice. I’m really pleased to hear things worked out well for you. I agree that family and life should always come first xx

  59. Thanks so much xx

  60. Thanks Denise, it’s been a right old slog but onwards & upwards now! Keeping everything crossed for happier kidlets πŸ™‚

  61. You’re very kind to say that, thank you πŸ™‚ xx

  62. Very true Aby, our lives change so much once we have kids. I guess finding the elusive balance between family and work is what we’re all striving to achieve. I used to have it with this job, just not anymore xx

  63. You are so kind Maddy, thanks lovely. Fingers crossed xxx

  64. Ali thank you so much for your kind message. I’ve found the difference in F when it comes to separation anxiety really noticeable, in comparison to his sisters. I will definitely check out the books you’ve recommended. I feel really good about the decision, but there is definitely an element of bracing myself for fear of the unknown though. Just hoping we can make it work financially xxx

  65. Thanks so much lovely, I certainly hope so xxx

  66. Thanks so much Charlotte. It’s great to hear that you have no regrets about giving up your job xxx

  67. Good luck! Well done for listening to yourself and doing what’s right for you! x #sundaystars

  68. Good Luck! This is so similar to my experiences. I gave up work properly in January and have not looked back. It has made me and the children happier, and made life a lot less complicated. Family and life should come before work in the balance equation! xx

  69. Love this! Well done you for doing something brave! Hope you enjoy your work free life and your babies enjoy having their mummy all to themselves ☺️ Xx #sundaystars

  70. I think you have done amazingly well to get the job, keep the job with kids, go back to work… I hear you being really hard on yourself, but kids just react in their own individual ways to each situations, and are just themselves at least as much as we “make” them who they are.
    Congrats to hubby on his promotion!
    And to you on taking charge and making a sensible decision for your family. I hope it will make your lives better.

  71. Wishing you luck but not sure you’ll need it as others have said you’re a strong lady and a survivor and I can see you going from strength to strength – have fun along the way x

  72. Oh huni, you will all be just fine, I know it because you are a fighter. Things change and even things that were our passions now longer feature in our lives when kids come along, it is a little sad but inevitable xx

  73. Sounds like you’re making exactly the right choice, and with your talents and attitude I have no doubt you’ll make a success of this next stage of your life.xxx

  74. Oh Renee, don’t beat yourself up on this one, you’ve made a decision that supports the family and that’s what an awesome mum does. Our kids come first, end of and there will be a time when you can get back to being a working mum as it’s a sad fact our little ones don’t stay little forever. As for the attachment parenting thing, well I’ve been teaching bonding and attachment classes for 4 years and the evidence shows that by being there for your babies at their most vulnerable time produces a more confident, independent child as they have healthy developed (nurtured) brains through not living in a state of constant flight or fight. (read Why Love Matters or What everyParent Needs To Know if you need more info) honestly chic, it sounds like you’re little fella just wants his mum, boys tend to struggle with childcare more than girls, it’s a fact. I try not to band on about my professional life in blog world but from a professional’s point of view you have read the signs and acted. and if it makes you feel any better, I’ve done exactly the same! phew that was a long one ; )

  75. You know what is right for you and your family – well done for acting on it. Good luck – but you’re a survivor who will make it work xxxx

  76. Good Luck xxxx

    I think a few people thought I was crazy when I left my job too but I knew what was right for my family and I don’t regret it at all.

Leave a Reply